Yes, Yom Kippur is my favorite Jewish holiday. Tho, it isn't really a holiday...which has a happy connotation to it in my mind...

It's my fav not b/c i have some sort of sadistic streak in me (tho i may...), or b/c i hate food--b/c if u know me...u know i LOVE food! But, somehow, I'm really excited about it. it gives me a chance to get things off my mind, unburden my shoulders, get stuff off my chest--u know, all those regular cliches that have become cliches b/c they are simply true & sound good (except when they become cliches...).

My life has been extremely stressful, depressing, draining, annoying and bothersome recently. Sometimes, I just wanted to go on vacation, stop living for a while, enough of the day-to-day crap...and just exist or not exist. But, I didn't want to do it anymore. Ah yes, I should remember my audience...Life was hard, but bearable...i mean, what is that other cliche?..."grin and bear it"? yeah, i did that...well, the grin was more of a deformed grimace, but u get my drift.

It's nice to be able to start anew, fresh and clean, b/c i really feel/felt like my life needed to be cleaned out. I needed to clear the air and straighten things out. For the most part, I think i have...and will...

yes, isn't it funny how it's so easy to dramatize your life. i mean, can it be that hard for anybody if they have the basic necessities...to go on living? At least i have a home, food and clothing...well, i have much more than that, & yet, I am not quite happy with my life. i kinda feel like there's so much more I could do, so much more i could be. I never feel like i'm living up to expectation or doing enough or being enough. it's so much pressure sometimes, that I find it hard to just be myself and be. And...now we know why i don't blog that much...b/c it invariably turns into some sort of ramble...i'll stop. now. tho there's so much more to say, so much more i could say. i wish i could.

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