Allyson, a really nice girl in the program went home earlier this week. She was very very homesick, apparently. I wish I'd known...because I would have tried to make her feel better. We did talk some, and both times I was the one near tears. Interesting. Anyway, it's a little scary. She was really nice. That makes two people in our program, of originally about 24 people, now 22, who have left...Sad and scary...how easy it is to give up...

Well, anyway...I screwed myself over because I have tons of work...lemme give you a birdseye...

Due dates: (in no particular order)
All internship apps due Oct. 15 (my date)--meaning essays, cover letters, clips, recommendations, resume, references, for each.
Oct. 14 ,Oral presentation on Rousseau (20% of my grade), also Sorbonne class, which I will be missing tonight, (2nd class)--need to figure out situation.
Oct. 11 , I need to have two books read for my literature class, about 80 pages of philosophy (Barthes, Levi-Strauss) read, plus make up Freud, Heidegger and Sartre readings (more than 100 pages).
Also due, regular French homework.
Also must figure out Sorbonne registration and class situation with professor.
Oct. 12, English lesson, second part of same Sorbonne class as Monday.

Somewhere within all that I will hopefully be getting Internet, hopefully not to late because some apps are online, and I must research online. And, when I get it...I'll have a great time setting it up, all on my lonesome.

I am the first oral presentation, and I don't know why I always have to screw myself over like that. I thought it'd be better to get it done because my parents are coming...hopefully soon, but then I found out we each have to do two...so there's really no point. Dammit all. And I have no clue what format it's supposed to be in...or anything. The prof was very vague about instructions and gave no indication of what we'd be graded on.

Gosh. I am such a stress ball. I also have written in my agenda...study for LSAT...yeah right. *sigh*

Falling apart already. Ah, such a mess.
And I have no food. No time to go to the market. No money either. But, that's beside the point. I had one thing of M&Ms and one thing of Haribo today. That's everything I've eaten since 8 a.m. this morning...it is now nearly 6 p.m.

I should really be writing my cover letter and essay, but I cannot think straight. Everything is just so overwhelming. And I do my best work at night...with the Internet...but, that's not possible here. No Internet access. And...alone without anything in my place...I just have to go to sleep so I don't get depressed.

The radio was good, but it ran out of batteries...and I can't take the batteries outta the discman or I will go crazy outside of my place...(it's my savior)...You say, "buy batteries"--well, it costs nearly $6 for a small pack of AA batteries. My parents hopefully will get here in about a week or two...if I can just last it till then...they're bringing batteries. (Although, I can imagine the wreckage I will be once they depart...I do fear this.)

Only one kewl thing. My parents bought a copy of my article in Germany and read it...oh yeah, and the WSJ wants me to keep writing for them. Or, so they say.

But other than that. Life's hell.