Today was a day of tears. There is so much changing in my life today. And though I am in one of the most pleasant spots--perhaps--on Earth...I feel so very incomplete, like something is lacking. It is almost like the near-attainment of that perfection, of this wonderful beach, beautiful sunset, calming breeze and warm weather, juxtaposed against the isolated lonely yearning I feel...only emphasizes the feeling and makes me feel worse.

I'm currently in Dahab, Egypt--most recently made famous by three bombings that killed more than a dozen and injured scores of tourists, about five months ago. It's eerie walking around here, but the Red Sea is quite beautiful.

Today my dad is finalizing the packing up of my childhood home. That's it. In a selfish way I am glad that I do not have to see it--nostalgia will always take me back to the perfected house that I once lived and grew up in, to the bike rides around the block, the friends I had nearby, walking home after school, dashing across the street...But, on the other hand, I do wish I was there to help my father pack up, to give him support. He has been working nonstop this past week or so, and he calls me at four or five in the morning for him there, sounding more and more depressed and sick each day. It hurts and gnaws at me, hearing him like that.

I wish he were here to travel with me. I feel so worthless and alone.

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