3/02/2007

Stifling hatred of self.

It's times like right now where I feel like throwing up the papers, laptop, whatever is in front of me--the more dramatic the better--and reconsidering exactly what I'm doing with my life.

What is wrong with me?

I can be so careless and irresponsible, and reckless sometimes. And I know the consequences of this--a loss of credibility...personal integrity gets marred, oh so easily. And there goes my estimation in the eyes of everyone that matters--including myself.

Things that are in my control, and yet I f*cking screw up.

Sometimes I think I need to reexamine my life, reexamine exactly what I am doing, and why I am doing it...and if I wouldn't perhaps be better suited for another job. Where my mistakes aren't so costly and so ruinous. Weeks of work, weeks of waiting, weeks of sourcing...screwed by one word.

F*ck me. GAHHHHHHHHH.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

what the hell happened? Do you want to be a bit more specific and include some details....how did you screw up??!??!?!

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IJW said...

Hey Winnie, Yeap, I still use msn, though not that often. We should definitely keep in better touch. Feel free to shoot me an email...=)